Sunday, December 8

There are opposing theories about the best way to deal with the emotional toll when one has a loved one with dementia.  It was discussed at our support group and the recommendation of finding peace and spending time meditating was suggested.  I couldn't quite agree because my way of dealing with just about everything is to stay really busy.  It seems to keep away brooding and feeling sorry for myself.

I may be approaching this the wrong way.  Admittedly I bit off way too much for the holiday season and find myself feeling overworked and physically challenged.  But I have always felt that keeping really busy was a good thing.

But I never been faced with "anticipatory grief" before and perhaps it is a different kind of emotional landscape that requires a different approach.  Not sure, am thinking on it.  I have decided to try something else.  It is developing in my brain right now and I am not sure exactly what my days should look like but I know for sure they are not going to look like they do right now.  More to follow.

I went to see Cowboy on Thursday because bad weather was predicted as coming in on Friday.  It was late in the day and I didn't stay too long but we had a nice visit.  Too cold to go out but we sat in the common room and talked to people part of the time.

On Friday, it was really cold and wet out but I got up and went and got a haircut at 8:30AM and then played a gig with the band at a adult day care at 10:30.  We were supposed to play with the dulcimer group Friday night at the museum but it was cancelled due to the weather.

Yesterday I went to dulcimer practice and then spent the rest of the day at home.

This morning I made peanut butter cookies to take to the home tomorrow.  I have prepared little gift bags.  They have chocolate kisses, a candy cane and some lotion.  A friend is bringing more cookies.  Just about have it all ready to go.

I am going to have to get ready for our neighborhood party in a few minutes.  I will be helping with the decor and setting up to play after our dinner.  It should be fun but my back hurts from all this chasing around and loading and unloading my gear.  I see pain meds coming up momentarily.